Time Traveler

How come I can not see the lies on your painted face?

I thought there was no secrets between you and me.

Whatever happened to the candle stick burning so brightly?

I know I’ve awakened you from you’re harmless day sleeping.

But now I hear footsteps in your eyes.

Then you are speaking to me and I can not hear what it is that you are saying to me.

I see only lines going up and down, of what is the sound that is coming out of your mouth.

You’re freedom escapes me like a mild night tiger.

My eyes escape your hearts desire.

Take me back to 1923.

Then when I was yours,and yours was me.

We sat and drink milkshakes for 20 cents.

You promised you’d buy me a big house with a tall white fence.

So I fast forward to 2020 where the future beholds a colorful thing.

These crazy lights are too much for me, so I go back to my least favorite time , year 2013.

Where I’m old and soon dieing; where death is all around me.

Twenty years ago is when you died, but however I didn’t cry.

On the awakening on you’re face was so pale and you slept peacefully in your crate.

I yawned that night and remembered your face the time we met.

We were so young and now destined for heaven or hell.

 

Hanging By A Thread

I’m hanging by a thread
The rope is breaking
The time is ticking
My fingertips are slipping
And the pain I’m in, its running through my veins
You don’t listen to a word I say and
The walls are closing in
It’s tough to keep my feet on the floor
My heart is reaching and
I can’t stand it.
My thoughts are being swirled around in the washing machine,
Like a whirl pool I can’t fight
What’s left of my heart is all I have to stay strong
Each minute the pain is growing stronger and stronger
The rain and thunderstorms are like the things I’m fighting through, just to make myself last
My eyelids are shutting and
My barin’s become dizzy
The colors they swirl around in my heart
Then I’m lying there and I’m breaking away
Crumbling like a chocolate chip cookies, that
Was dunked into milk too long.
I’m slipping away at the seams and
I’ve become something I’m not

May I Say

You make me feel like I wanna break way.

I wanna swim away, like a tiny little fish.

Let me go free in the ocean.

Tell me I have enough courage to make this last.

Tell me I’ll be loved till the end of time.

I’m not lost.

I know who I am , just not what I’m born to do.

You sit here and tell me that I’m beautiful.

I don’t see what you see.

But my eyes do not lie to me.

Only my bairn lies.

My heart, it leads me to things.

Then, it throws away all my happiness and leaves me broken down in a alley way.

People think I’m weird.

I was told to be myself growing up.

Different.

Different is what im compared to everyone else.

Though no body is the same.

You can’t be the same.

Even if you act the same, dress the same,talk the same or even sound that same, no one can still be all the same even after all that.

It was nice to know that you were there for me , even when you didn’t want to be.

But now knowing that you can’t be there for me is a breaking point.

To know that you can’t even talk to me.. it’s unbearable.

More like heart wrenching.

Why not just tear me to pieces, then to feed me to the dogs around the block.

Promises that you made me.

You left a open gate of my heart.

At Least what’s left of it.

I promise to change all my values next time I see you again and I swear I will never agree with you and all those words you said.

I’m sorry but I can only see this as a breakthrough.

I’m sorry for the person I became and I’m ready to ignore all the pain.

But each moment I see you.

The tears well up in my eyes.

Then I’m standing there, ready to cry.

Color Scribbles

 

Tomorrow will always be more forgotten.

The yesterday will always be remembered.

So on that Wednesday night, when I’m sitting there all alone.

I will remember you. In the back of my mind.

Somewhere.

Somehow.

I don’t want to.

Don’t know how to.

I’m trying so hard to push away my feelings for you,but somehow they keep tumbling back.

Whenever they come back,I shut my eyes.

Shut my eyes of fear of what I might be seeing, whatever it is , it will remind me of you.

You and all your bitterness,tangy on my tongue.

But even with my eyes shut, my thoughts pass through my bairn,nose and ears,now out there.

All over the place.

My thoughts.

So tangled, like headphones in my pocket.

So messy like a five year old scribbles.

Just random different color scribbles.

To us they make no sense, but to them it could be a tree,a train,a butterfly.

Maybe that’s just how everyone thinks.

So these are my ways of saying good bye.